Big Fish*

I was never any good at fishing. I have some famous stories that are still told about me and I think my Dad in heaven is still untangling the lines I snared on opening day, first cast of the day, of trout season. The key to fishing is to catch a fishes interest. He may not bite the first time, but you've got his attention. Then you lay that bait right out in front of him and wait for him to bite. Remember this is all theory, I've never actually done this, but sometimes you get a hunch the next one is going to bite. Well, I baited my hook, cast my line and went to bed in hopes of finding a big one on the line when I woke up today.

Last night I slept peacefully and like out of a dream a big old JackFish had taken my bait, hook, line and sinker. I can't describe the happiness I felt. My eyes became moist. Dreams were coming true. Jack Lauderback mentioned ME by name on his cleverly named blog. Jack Goes Forth (Reader warning, infantile material is standard content, read at your own risk, Mary, Mom, don't go there.) Jack fails to credit me with the idea of a reader mailbag and also fails to note that anonymity is a key element. In my case though he had full permission to quote me chapter and verse. It is one of the great milestones of my life and I'm of the opinion that there is no such thing as bad publicity. That he fails to mention my blog by name or offer a linkback is just bad manners. To expect anything else would be to expect too much. Jack has done his research and read at least one of my articles. He thinks it important to identify my employer and rag the RTD, which he didn't complain about when they featured him.

Jack does not know what I do for a living, when I do it or where and he thinks the vast fortune I am paid determines my point of view. Just so you know I have never been paid one dime by the Times Dispatch and have never been published, except for an occasional letter to the editor.

But Jack does me honor, even if he has none. He is happy, people love him and thousands flock to his website. Now thousands of people are wondering who this Paul Hammond guy is and why does Jack care?

I could go on and on about this, but I have decided to throw Jack back. He's not a keeper. Dad would be proud.

*Update
Jack Strikes Again burning (not recommended reading) another "reader". He is one of the vilest people I've come across.