Apocalypse Now

CNN reports a worldwide epidemic spells the end of civilization as we know it. I've been suspecting this all along and it means we can stop worrying about other pesky details like global warming, rogue comets and aliens violating us in our sleep. Some people enjoy that kind of thing, but I'd rather stick with my own nightmares like unplanned public nudity and teleportation.




I myself have seen signs of the apocalypse right here on this oracle of nonsense. Don Harrison visited and left a civil note of common ground. This disturbs me greatly, but now I know that the earth is off its kilter and we soon will all be dead. This is liberating somehow and I am going to live each day like its my last, dance like no ones watching and maybe even attempt some public nudity during daylight hours. Who cares if I'm walking around with no pants. Just to show a bit of modesty I think I'll wear a jockstrap. It provides a comfort fit and you still get that bare buns feeling. Just so you know, I've started working out and if we last long enough it might not be too disturbing. Just think of me as a 50 year old Coppertone guy.